Poop

I went with some guys from work to check out a house that we were interested in buying as a rental. We walked in the house and noticed that it had not been updated since it was built in the early 40's. The house was smurf blue, the carpet was green. Even the bathroom was carpeted with pee stains all around the toilet. I ran downstairs to check it out and when I turned on the light, I was instantly covered in poop. There was poop all over me, all over my pants, shirt, tie, head. There was poop in my shirt pocket. I had no idea how this happened! I had not gone to the bathroom, I had not tooted, and I had not hung around feces throwing monkeys. I started screaming and I ran upstairs to show the others what had happened. I walked into the kitchen and David and Nick were cooking hot dogs and eating twinkies. Nick was in disco attire, sporting a massive gold chain around his neck with a peace sign on it. They offered me a twinkie but not a hot dog and told me hot dogs were for the disco dancers and since I crapped myself I could not be a disco dancer. I went to reach for a hot dog and Nick hit me in the head with his gold chain and knocked my teeth out. Then...............I woke up